My reality today...

I've been pondering my childhood lately, this after mulling over some conversations I've had with my youngsters lately. As I chewed on some hot topics I became aggravated that I have such a difficult time protecting my children from the infiltration of crap. My definition of crap is definitely going to be different from someone else...but, let's just say that as conservative, Christian mom who strives to live and follow what I consider the "Handbook of Life"...my Bible, crap is anything that helps to destroy the innocence of my children or hinders their spiritual growth.

Reflecting back to my own childhood...I've always remembered and said that my parents definitely gave me a wonderful strong foundation in which to build my life. I would consider my upbringing very conservative and sheltered...what I used to call overprotective. No problem until the summer of my 10th grade year with peer pressure veered me off the "goody, goody girl" path and onto the "rebellious out of control teen" path. I guess my point is, my parents tried their best...gave me tons of love and a wonderful life. Protected and sheltered me to the best of their abilities...yet I still fell victim to crap.

I've been mulling over all of what I consider crap today...the little things that children are exposed to at earlier ages. What I see is how much innocence is lost with our youth...what is sad to me is that it has become common to not bat an eye at any of it...there's no element of surprise, nobody blushes anymore and everything is accepted as normal...normal for today's world. I actually love and miss the innocence of yesterdays youth...I see now that what I experienced is nothing compared to today. I'm also sure that every generation has felt the same way.

I've tried like the dickens to protect them and allow them the freedom of being kids without all the garbage of today...that's my job to deal with the garbage until they are old enough to carry the weight. That means I didn't and don't want them to learn about adult content until what we, their parents deem the age appropriate time. I don't consider the fact that I was protected and sheltered a hindrance...and just perhaps had my mom and dad taken the time to explain life, their expectations and opinions to me regarding sex, drugs & alcohol, it might have made a difference. So that's what I'm trying to do...explain life to the kids in time but hopefully not before time.

As my children grow, make friends and live it is becoming harder to protect them. I can't physically put them in a bubble...nor would I. But I do wish I could buy them a little more time to be little and innocent. Growing up really isn't all that great...and learning about adult habits certainly is not the highlight of youth. I will admit that as my oldest grows the conversations are becoming easier, only because he is now at the age of understanding... and he gets it. But for my little, I'm really struggling...she deserves the same protection the oldest has always had, but I find it increasingly more challenging to keep her innocence safe.

So...was the crap I was exposed to in my youth beneficial or a hindrance for mental, physical or spiritual growth? I know that without the experiences good or bad, that I'd probably not parent the way I do. Could I be a good parent without those experiences? Could I somehow be a better parent? Without those memories, would I not worry as much about them attaching themselves to peer pressure and having the same life experiences? or...is it because of my experience and memories that I so desperately want to guard their mind and soul?

I'm reminded of a children's song...certainly not in it's entirely...but what I feel are the key parts.
.
Oh be careful little eyes what you see...
Oh be careful little ears what you hear...
Oh be careful little tongue what you say...
Oh be careful little hands what you do...
Oh be careful little feet where you go...
Oh be careful little mind what you think...
Oh be careful little heart what you love...

I'm also reminded that you can never un-see what you saw, or un-hear what you heard...a very brief moment can make a life changing impact in a child's life...good or bad.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-8SYA6rfbs